Sarah’ s story is about her journey through several miscarriages and her most recent pregnancy. Sarah originally shared her story on Facebook around Thanksgiving and it highlights a VERY real and silent struggle that many, many women face. One in four women will experience a miscarriage and one in four to six couples face infertility. This is why getting pregnant, staying pregnant, and delivering a healthy baby is truly a miracle.
This time of year, I like seeing everyone’s posts about what they’re thankful for–a nice break from political rants, daily complaints, and all of the craziness going on in the world. I’m feeling particularly thankful this year. Yesterday marked the 18th week of my pregnancy, and I couldn’t feel more blessed. I’m grateful for each passing week, knowing that I’m that much closer to meeting our baby. I still have a long way to go, but so far so good. And I’m not going to worry, until I have something to worry about. Pregnancy has been a rough road for me over the past 2 years. Some of you may not know, but I’ve had 2 miscarriages before this pregnancy, something I wouldn’t wish on anyone. It’s probably one of the most devastating things a woman can go through. The first time I found out I was pregnant, I was shockingly excited. Larry and I had only been together for a few months, but we had already talked about marriage and kids, so even though it was sooner than expected, we were really happy and excited. Having kids was not something I had ever really thought that much about, before I was with him. But once I found out I was pregnant, it was life changing. It was something I never knew I wanted. But now it was all I wanted. Everything seemed fine, and we went to my first OB appt at 8 1/2 weeks. That’s when we were told that there was no heartbeat, and I would have to get a D&C (dialation and curettage procedure). I felt like someone punched me in the stomach and knocked the wind out of me. So devastating. All the hopes and expectations we had, went right out the door at that very moment. So the following week, I had my D&C, at which time they discovered I have a rare condition with my uterus. I have a bicornuate uterus, which means it’s heart-shaped… making me high risk for miscarriages, preterm labor, etc etc…basically because I can only carry in one side, which can be problematic. Or it can be totally fine, it’s really a toss up. So in a nutshell, my body is “not ideal for carrying babies”, my one doctor told me. Oh, awesome, that’s comforting.
So, a year later, another miscarriage and D&C. Fun times. Weirdly enough, they don’t really do any kind of testing or anything, until you’ve had 3 consecutive miscarriages. It’s not considered “abnormal” until that point. Super frustrating.
So, less than a year after that, a few weeks before our wedding, I was late on my period and took a pregnancy test. Holy shit I was pregnant again! At first I was excited, but then considering my track record, the frustration of what most likely was ahead, set in. I just wanted to get through my wedding and honeymoon. A few days later, I got my period (so I thought). I figured maybe I had a chemical pregnancy, or a super early miscarriage, something like that. Whatever the case, I made a doctor’s appt for the week after our honeymoon. I’ll figure it out then.
So because I had been through this twice already, and I for sure wasn’t expecting any happy news, I was fine going to my appt by myself that day. I even marked down on the exam sheet, that my reason for my appt was a “3rd miscarriage”. The ultrasound tech started my exam, but the look on her face seemed different than the past 2 times. She told me she’s not sure why I had been bleeding, but there’s a baby with a heartbeat in there! She turned the screen around so I could see, and holy shit, I’ve never seen anything more beautiful and amazing in my entire life. At that moment, I knew without a doubt, God exists (something I’ve questioned), and was there in that room with me. That was the only way that this was possible. It truly felt like a miracle. I was 10 weeks pregnant, further along than I’ve ever been, and everything looked normal.
If you’ve read this far, I thank you for listening to my story. It’s a story that I’ve come to realize, a lot of women share, unfortunately. Although it’s an extremely sensitive topic, I think it’s important to talk about and share with each other. As I started opening up to some people about my journey, I was surprised to learn of how many people also struggled with miscarriage and/or fertility issues. Some of them were in the midst of their struggles, some had overcome them. Their stories comforted me and gave me hope. I hope my story can do the same for someone. Never give up hope, where there is a will, there is a way. I feel extremely blessed, and thankful for the family, friends, and doctors who have helped me through everything. (Especially my husband, you give me strength I never knew I had. You’re amazing.)
After I posted my original post above, a very sweet client of mine messaged me, and something she said reminded me that on the last day of our honeymoon in Hawaii, we saw a rainbow as we were leaving the hotel. Call it a coincidence, but it brought me luck a few days later!
An update from Sarah:
Our beautiful son, Camden, was born on May 7, 2016 at 2:40am. The birth went pretty smoothly, and he’s just been the best baby ever since. He really is a sweet little angel, and brings such a joy to our family. I fell in love with him the second I saw him, love I never knew existed. Any heartache or pain I had ever experienced in the past, had been replaced with the purest love I’ve ever felt in my life. He is a gift from God, and he was worth going through everything I’d gone through.
At 11 weeks old, he already has the funniest personality. He loves to laugh and smile, watch reality tv shows with Mommy, go on walks outside with his Nonna, watch boxing with Daddy, listen to his Pop sing songs to him, take Snapchat videos and selfies, and is already on the verge of talking and walking!